The boys are thirsty in Atlanta and there's beer in Texarkana...

The above quote has nothing to do with my life except for the fact that I have read it, heard it, and I like black T/As with CB antennas.


1) I was at a big band and gospel Christmas concert a couple weeks ago. I was ready to hear some rocking big band and soul. I got my money's worth. There was one thing, though, that made the whole thing almost unbearable.

I was surrounded by Yanks who were just a few years into retirement.

"I was at the garden club last night...."
"We had a wonderful women's meeting..."
"Applebee's has those wonderful low carb options and we tried those the other day and..."

Like fingernails on a chalkboard.


2) Right before Christmas, we visited an old AME church downtown. One of my dad's coworkers invited us because they were having a sort of veteran's appreciation service as well as some Christmas music.

Never in my life have I seen or heard such a service. It was completely awesome.

"I told y'all that we might have a little change in the program with the Spirit movin and amen here we go again. We gonna have some music by the wonderful _______ and amen you better be prepared to be blown away."

This white boy is considering another visit.

3) Yet another reason for you all to deny having any relations with me.

If I were to travel anywhere outside the US (which has never happened), I would go to some place that tourists tend to avoid. The Middle East is big on my list of places to visit, and I don't mean some tourist trap like Dubai.

4) I would like to own a bike some day. You know, a Harley or something along those lines. What frustrates me to no end are people who put their Harley on a trailer and then tow it great distances. It makes no sense. Why buy a ten thousand dollar bike that was purpose built for highway cruising and turn it into a trailer queen?

And don't even get me started about the scam known as E-85 Ethanol and government subsidies.

MPGs...

Why, oh why, did the President sign that energy bill?

Why, oh why, does the government have to push stupid regulations on auto manufacturers? It's not the manufacturer's fault that the customer wants to by a gas-guzzling SUV!

So Ford Motor Company, bless its little soul, is touting that it's new Edge SUV gets twenty-something miles-per-gallon on the highway. Gee, the same company just so happened to make my car thirteen years ago. My car is a luxury steel uni-body with a V8 that just so happens to get the same or better gas mileage as that ugly Edge. You'd think that with thirteen years gone by, Ford Motor Company would have the sense to make the fuel economy somewhat decent. Especially with the explosion of eletronically controlled valve timing and such. The fact that they think 26 MPG on the highway is something to tout is sad. I'll keep my Thunderbird, thank you, and the government will not be able to touch it.

I hate these...

"40 Secrets About Yourself. Be honest no matter what."

1- Have you ever been asked out? Not that I know of.
2- Where was your default picture taken? I don't have one.
3- What is your middle name? P.
4- Your current relationship status? Brother, Son
5- Does your crush like you back? That’s the dumbest term ever.
6- What is your current mood? Electric
7- What color pants are you wearing? LCS Red and White
8- What color shirt are you wearing? White
9- What is your favorite thing to do? Honestly, I have always felt at home when running from people who are trying to shoot me.
10- If you could go back in time and change something, would you? Sure.
11- If you must be an animal for one day, what would you be? Either a whale, so I could go deep down into the ocean, or a falcon.
12- Ever had a near death experience? Not that I know of…
13-Something you do a lot? Listen to music.
14- What do you want to be when you get older? A lot of things.
15- Who did you copy and paste this from? Steph
16- Name someone with the same birthday as you? Bill Goldberg.
17- When was the last time you cried? I’m not going to tell you.
19- If you could have one super power what would it be? To be able to breath underwater.
20- What's the first thing you notice about the opposite/same sex? Their eyes.
21- What do you usually order from starbucks? I hate starbucks.
22- What's your biggest secret? I don’t remember…
23- Favorite color? The color of any sea.
25- Do you still watch kiddy movies or tv shows? Noooooo…..
26- What are you eating or drinking at the moment? Oxygen
28- What's your favorite smell? Gunpowder or a Chevy small block.
29- Describe your life in one word what it be? Life….which is cool.
31- Have you ever kissed in the rain? How….schmaltzy.
32- What are you thinking about right now? Finishing this quiz.
33- What should you be doing right now? Practicing piano.
34- Who was the last person that made you upset/angry? Hmm….
35-Why are you doing this? I really don’t know.
36- Do you like working in the yard? Maybe.
37- If you could have any last name in the world, what would it be? My current one or Korbelak.
38- Do you act differently around the person you like? Define “like”.
39- What is your natural hair color? Muddy blond.
40-What did you think about this survey? It’s dumb, just like the rest of them.

Just when you thought chivalry was dead...

Road and Track reminds you that it still exists.