Thursday, January 10, 2008

Gimme Three Steps...

I am stumped.

Let me clarify that. Whenever I think of someone as being stumped, a figure with a grimaced face and head cocked to one side always dwells among my thoughts. However, that is not the case this time.

Now it's like I'm someone who's had his arms and legs completely sliced off, like a tree stump (so I feel "stumped"). I can't pick up anything, I can't run anywhere, I just fall the ground with a carnal thud and lie there. Wonderful.

What am I saying? I don't know what is in store for me. Is it necessary for me to know? Of course not, but not knowing what God has in store for me in the future is like being mutilated at all four corners and left to sit and wait. Arrgh.

As frustrating as it may seem, I think it's probably a necessary step. I mean, how can my limbs do what God wants them to do if they aren't submissive to His will? It's like a transplant of sorts. Right now, I'm without limbs. Is it better than having limbs? The absence of my old appendages that only listened to me is a good thing no matter if they have been replaced or not. I'm just waiting for a transplant here, because I have no idea what lies beyond the horizon when I take those first few steps with my new and improved legs.

2 comments:

Stephanie said...

I have never heard that feeling described better. I'm praying for you as you wait for your new limbs.

frugalhsmom said...

haha, me either. Never thought of it that way, but I totally know what you mean. I was just thinking the other day how frustrating it was that I know God has something in store for me, but at the moment I can't do anything about it, I just have to wait until He calls me. Not knowing drives me crazy, but I also realize that it might ruin everything if I knew right now what will happen in the future. It'd also take all the fun and mystery out of life...it's like getting your new limbs prematurely. You wouldn't know how to use them correctly and probably fall all over the place and misuse things. :D I'm content with waiting...


bri